the pain in you or me?

Nothing links.

I keep on making the same mistakes time and time again.
I hate it when I let my will power slip away when I'm drinking. All the damage it has cost and stirred up. My behaviour and thoughts these past few weeks has been somewhat unexpected from me.

I read my older posts the other day and I realise how idiotic of a person I can be sometimes when caught up in a situation. My apologies. I might have over exaggerated my feelings towards some things which were unnecesary.

I guess everyone goes through this phase, the whole having to accept the fact that you're going to face reality soon, having all these weird depression phases, guilt, needy, lonely, thinking that karma hates you phases. All bundled up in one go while trying to have fun at the same time. It's bloody exhausting. I'm exhausted. I just want my mind to be in a state of serenity.

I suppose this is being selfish, while there are others out there with much more issues and problems in their lives. Compared to them, my current discontent with life is just a cherry top on a humoungous multi layered sundae.

depressed much?